Although the road ahead are very tiring, i just noe tat just one day i will find my new her... Juz gimme sometime and i'll think i'll be livin in her beautiful world... May Buddha bless me.. Amitofuo~~~
10:54 PM

Life-----

Recently while i was getting some sleep, i kept on thinking abt wad death was all abt... The thought of me can no longer exist totally frightens me... No more havoc and no more viewing of the world is kinda sad.... However, i've thought abt it and realize that i'll have to be more serious in life and cherish every bits and pieces of it.. I wish to beautify my life wiv lots of good frenz and my dear family... Its kinda mushy but dat cant be helped it... For now, i've changed... After workin at DHL post, i knew a guy named jeremy and his perception in life changed my character.. He showed me that being nice and trying to helped other pple changed for the better is kinda happy and a sense of warmth.. Although i've not grab the whole idea abt death but one ting for sure.. I'll decorate my life wiv so many graceful things till the day when i die, i will live in their heart... Muahahaha...

Love----

Talkin abt this, im a total idiot in this field.. Spending 2 years of recuperation, i think dat i'm almost abt to recover frm it... Haha.. Its time for me to start on a new life and forget abt it..
Its almost lyk wadeva i do, no one appreciates and there im suffering but no one noes... Maybe others will think , "who cares?" but its true... Okay enough of it and time to BE STRONG!

Friends----

Everything starting to get better and its like we are like back in the same old times again... Chatting from afternoon until midnight in cafe cartel and unwilling to go home, dats the way of life man.... Every bits and pieces of ur life adventures may be interesting to others but u've to know how to exaggerate man.. And pple out there, pls don be ashamed of the bad tings u did in the past... As thats part of ur childhood, if we did someting different at that tym, maybe we wont be able to have a link wiv wad other pple say abt their childhood...

Sign Off---
ALIYOZ DUDE(Lex's Quote)
PeNgz....
9:12 AM

Just in a blink of eye, 17 years have passed... I still remember the day when i finally noe how to change my pampers by my own... I always wished to cherish the time with my family but i juz dunno how as its quite funny to give them a friendly hug... Maybe filial is wad is count.. Many things have happened though... I've found my other self but just cant be with it no matter how i tried.. Fate 70% and own determination stands only 30%... i have given my fullest determination but all it depends is on the fate part... haha... juz in a few months, fate disappoint me... Dont say i nv tried.. I've tried , just tat no one could see it... My struggle and my ache, i've experienced most of it in that few single months.. Im constantly trying to understand you more but im afraid... Just a look in her profile and wad pple wrote for her and maybe i can noe? Lol.. Its not tat easy man.. Try looking back into ur old flame's profile and see what her boyfriend wrote for her, and tell me wad u feeling now.. Isnt that easy rite.. Lol.. FORGET IT... I shall have this darkest problem keep to myself for the rest of my life although i know i will be hurt by it sooner or later... I just cant put it down... Sry for those love i've disappointed.. I was trying to use it to cover up for the wounds caused by my old flame...

Love---

I think that i dont have the courage to tell u but i'll post it on my blog and let fate decide whether u'll see it or not..

Seriously, I've already understand ur decision... But some things i have to make clear...
I tried to be with other girls becoz i thought i didnt have ur attention and i didnt contact wiv u coz i'm afraid that i will upset u thru my words.. Dats y i always nv scolded u back.... 2004 im sure u still remember when i msged u again... but after some period i stopped msging u and stopped communicating with u... Dats becoz i knew i was a nuisance to u and wads more.. Im a useless guy who sux in everything.. I didnt meant to pester u but i just couldnt help it ya.. hah.. finally let this out of my mind.. may u read this and understand.. and i guess u wont see me anymore... so tk care ya ;p


11:29 AM

Wen a guy reali falls in love and becomesfaithful to his beloved, his change in hischaracterwill reali shock every1 around him.. His egoistheart will uncompromisingly softens when hewillingly gives his heart to the lady he falls inlovewith.. furthermore he'll be willing to sacrificeeverythin and do anythin fer his loved one.. Nomatter how egoist he may be, tears will fallfromhis cheeks wen his heart's broken.. It's noteasyto see guys who would truly cry fer their lovedones...~(( 20 signs to recognise the strong love a guyholds fer his beloved... ))1. he willingly do anythin n everythin fer hisbeloved.. with sincerity not coercion2. he constantly wans to humour his belovedandtends to be more talkative3. he tends to advise his beloved more as hetrulyloves her and wans her to be a better person4. he tries to restrict her freedom due to hisoverwhelmin jealousy5. he constantly fears losin his beloved6. he always monitors his beloved'smovementsas he feels insecure7. he hates e idea of other guys bein close tohisbeloved8. he becomes jealous and sensitive wen hisbeloved pays less attention to him9. he becomes the most hardworking person nhelp his beloved to do anythin n everythin10. he becomes restless wen his beloved'sawayfer too long11. he cares fer his beloved more than hedoeshimself12. he constantly asks if his beloved loves himashe feels his love is greater than his beloved's13. he would not be bothered wif other galswhodun hold any importance to him14. he will try to spend a lot of time wif hisbelovedeven tho he noes he'll end up waitin fer hisbeloved15. he praises his beloved in front of others16. if his beloved leaves him, he cant trust anyother gal n wishes fer his beloved to comeback tohim17. wen ther is a third party, he loses his mindandis willing to do anythin to fight fer his beloved18. he makes sure he ensures her safety at alltimes19. he is lyk a small kid who fights fer constantattention from his beloved20. he treats his beloved as his most trustedoneand willing to sacrifice all of his wealth andevenhis life fer her~it's not easy to find guys who would shed theirtears jus fer gals.. so pls treasure them...~*if u agree wif wad was written above..repost
8:01 AM

Sittin down in the middle of the night.. now me sittin down thinkin of the matter which i had troubles in... needless to say... i guess my buddies wood noe tat... to be frank... i got the same old disappointed feeling when i knew abt the fact... maybe that person said tat i was a bastard to get on wiv her new relationship but did tat person ever noe... dat was the only way to reduce my pain... and no one could ever noe wads goin on in me.. now im all alone.. not hoping for someting neither wishin for someting juz prayin tat i could get on with my life asap... but now.. it seems i got a new target... the far east... i was hit down by the first sight of it... I nv had the feelin of warmth since the day when she was gone in my life... but strange enuf... the far east gave me everything back... but one thing for sure.. im not the best for her.. i just noe it... of all to blame is my inferior looks.. but wad matters is heart rite... however... my heart juz dont haf the strength anymore and dont haf e courage anymore longer...
9:01 AM